a first for the diva.

i wrote this post i dont know where it went. i am guessing hyperspace. hmm.

so while we were in north carolina kenadie went to the ocean. my inner self was freaking out so bad. the bacteria, the sand, the rocks, how will she react?! well i calmed myself down and just said go with it. so we get there we all go out to the ocean water. she loves it. she didnt care two winks about the sand on her feet or the rocks. she absolutely loved it and bonded with her godpapi as she calls him and ms leah her buddy. they were two peas in a pod. mostly at the ocean though she had godpapi runnimg back and forth from the ocean. when we told her it was time to go she was so upset. mom i love the beach and feel free. i bet kid. she did get her first kiss of sun.

as i seen her enjoying these moments i cherished  them all. one thing kenadie has taught me is you dont know when the next time you will have them if ever. i cherish  everything my kids do now. i am a total different mom. i am the mom that crys at first. i hid my tears of joy at the ocean until i went to bed. i cried hard. just seeing my baby so happy especially as much as she has going on.

i also got the opportunity to bond more with Cameron (godpapi) and his awesome wife leah. cameron is my cousin who is enlisted in the marines and stationed at camp lejune. he came the day k went flatline at duke. she was in his arms drawing. ever since they have had a great bond. he was there for her check up after pm didnt leave her side. he got back from deployment before this round of check up and was there every moment.

her dr appt was so frustrating as the dr was mad he was not kept in the loop. so they did some bw and it came back craptastic. then referred us to the leader in immunology in the US. we wait for her to accept her. then go from there.i am somewhat against it. like why bother. her immuno has a baseline going. yes its so dangerous in the position that we are in. first good infection and we are out of the fight. but her poor body has been through so much.

so we wait to hear what is going on.

after clinic we hunted down some food had a great drink and they took her shopping..they had a blast. then after her halter was taken off she went swimming and loved that too.

she keeps saying mom i miss godpapi and Leah. i cant wait to go to the beach again. i cant either. she was so happy careless and free.

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